Gardner has recently started doing something that usually doesn't hit until 9 months....developing stranger anxiety. As terrible as it appears to those on the outside who aren't parents, it is completely normal. I had to look it up and research it to make myself believe that.....because it automatically made me thing I was doing something totally wrong.

Babies are at the age now where they are insecure because of many things. They are finally able to have object conservation....meaning that they know that just because they can't see an object, it still exists. (Thus, when I duck out of the room, I don't automatically vanish from his thoughts anymore. His memory recalls me and he cries for me to return.)

Babies at this age are also learning to sit up and pre-crawl. This creates an uneasiness because of instability....when Gardner topples and bangs his head on the floor, he cries mercilessly. He is learning that some movements may cause pain, and that is a difficult thing to understand and come to accept.

They are also becoming extreme social creatures at this time. They are developing tighter bonds with their parents, and strange or less-familiar faces are threatening or scary. Totally normal, I will say it again, but still it hurts my heart when he cries in the arms of someone he delighted in just a few weeks ago. So please don't take it personally, guys....it is "just a stage." And no, that's not a cop-out answer! It really is a stage!

We are encouraging him to be able to be left with other caretakers whenever possible, as tough as it is on him (and for me, too, sometimes, even now). It is essential for his healthy social development, and essential for his growing up happy and secure.

I have to say, though, it makes me feel just a LITTLE bit good when he cries and holds his hands out for me. I never thought I'd feel so good about being needed so much by somebody. All the mamas out there...holla. You know exactly what I mean. ;)

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